Identify the fallacies committed in the following dialogue. You should be able to find at least one case of each fallacy presented in this section and a few of the fallacies presented in the two previous sections.

Personal Paper Mill

Carly catches sight of Brad as the two head for their class in sociology. "Hi!" she says as she joins him. "Did you get your paper finished?"

"Yes," he replies. "And given that first-rate work deserves an A, I deserve an A for this paper."

"That's great!" she says.

"But just between you and me, I had my girlfriend write my paper."

"Don't tell me that." Carly looks disgusted. "Do you think that's moral?"

"Beats me. Why do you always insist on giving moral advice to everyone?"

"The real question is, why do you always ignore moral advice?" she asks.

"Well, the way I see it," Brad says, "there's really nothing wrong with plagiarism. After all, students who plagiarize their work usually get better grades. Anyway, I'm just following in the footsteps of most U.S. presidents. They have speechwriters who write most of their speeches. Why shouldn't I get someone to write my papers?"

"You are so stupid!" Carly replies. "Honestly, I really think everyone should stop listening to you."

"Okay, how about this?" he asks. "Either I get someone to write this paper for me, or

I'll get an F in the class. I can't afford to get an F; thus, I get someone to write the paper for me."

"That's not much better," Carly replies. "But you should realize that plagiarism is really dangerous. If you get caught, it could destroy your reputation."

"I doubt many students would think badly of me," he says. "Practically everyone plagiarizes their work nowadays, and if they do it, so can I."

"It's not true that all students plagiarize their work," Carly replies. "In fact, I am quite certain that none of them do. I certainly don't, and all of the students I know don't."

"Ah, but you do plagiarize your work," Brad insists.

"What do you mean?" Carly asks.

"Well, every word of your paper appears in the dictionary, so it's clear that you plagiarized it from the dictionary."

"Very funny," Carly says. "But here's what I think. I think you should ask Professor

Halvorson for an extension on your paper and write it yourself. She really takes plagiarism seriously, and she insists that all work submitted to her be original."

"But this paper is original work," Brad insists, as they enter the social sciences building. "My girlfriend has never written a paper like this before, and she didn't copy it from anyone."

Carly laughs. "I don't think that's what she means by 'original.'" Incidentally, did you remember to attach a copy of the integrity pledge to the front of your paper? The academic integrity policy says that all instructors must direct their students to sign their full name on the integrity pledge, which asserts that the work being submitted has not been plagiarized."

"Yes, I have attached a copy of the pledge document to the paper, and I signed it 'Professor Judy Halvorson,' just as the rule says."

"How dense can you get?" Carly asks. "You're not supposed to sign the professor's name! You're supposed to sign your own name."

"Oh," says Brad. For the first time he looks concerned. "But that means I would be lying."

"Yes, it would," Carly agrees, "but I don't see why that should bother you. Still, I can assure you of this: If you hand in the paper, you won't graduate."

"You're wrong about that," Brad counters. "Consider this. I'm a member of the senior class, and the senior class graduates in May. That means I'll graduate in May."

"I wouldn't bet on it," Carly says, as they approach their classroom. "You forget that I'm on the Academic Integrity Committee, and I've sworn to uphold the policy on plagiarism."

"Uh oh." Brad looks concerned again. "That had slipped my mind. But you won't rat on me, will you? Please, please don't. All my life I have struggled with my sense of self-esteem, and if I get an F on this paper, I will feel absolutely crushed."

"Rat on you? Well, that depends," says Carly.

They enter the classroom, and Brad gives Carly a tense smile. "On what?"

Carly smiles grimly back. "On whether you hand in the paper your girlfriend wrote."