Analysis Final draft

Guidelines:

Final Draft: Process Analysis Assignment: Observe someone who works or practices in the community you chose to write about for this semester, describing and analyzing their process. Final Draft: Saturday Length: Two pages, Points: 15 Guidelines: Provide an in-depth examination of someone who participates in the community that you chose for this semester. First, introduce us to who they are and what they do. Then, describe them: their background in this subject, their appearance, their environment. As they are doing an activity (cooking, teaching, playing football, drawing, parenting, caring for patients, etc.) detail what they have done step by stepthis is their process. For your final draft, you may include/me/my in areas that indicate your own actions during the observation if you need to. For the final draft, add an analysis paragraph that thinks more deeply and subjectively about what you have observed. Why does the person perform this activity this way? Are they good at what they do? Interested in the activity? How does their environment and the background you presented earlier contribute to your analysis? How does this relate to your overall opinion of your community and direction of your topic this semester? My preference is that you would observe someone in real life, but if you can't, you can observe someone via a YouTube video. If so, include the name of the video, the user name of the person who posted it, who is in it, and the general idea of what will happen in the video in your intro. Here is how I will grade you: 1. Introduction establishes the subject of the essay in an engaging but general opening sentence, names the person you will be observing, how you will be observing them (title and user name if it is a video) and states what they will be doing. See examples. (1.5 point) 2. Ends with a thesis statement that connects what you observed to your analysis paragraph (1 point) 3. Include a paragraph of impartial, objective observation detailsa) background, b) appearance, c) environment. (3 points) 4. List the steps they perform in at least one activity, in chronological order. If you are interviewing someone, include it in this paragraph and ask them how they complete their process (2 points) 5. Use transitions to connect steps of their process and/or interview (.5) 6. Keep your opinions, subjective language, and I/me/my out of the first three paragraphs (1 point) 7. In your final analysis paragraph, use your logic to explain how or why the person performs the activity the way that they do. Refer to Online Writing 3 for notes on why people develop a process and check out the sample paper I posted this week. What do their surroundings contribute to your interpretation? What does the person's actions say about their connection to the activity or community you chose? (3 points) 8. Use descriptive, accurate word choice that is appropriate for this kind of essay (and is not circuitous!). Review the notes for further information. Keep papers free of fragments, apostrophes, spelling and capitalization errors (3 points)

My Draft:

Title: The Starry Night: A Journey with John Dobson, the Sidewalk Astronomer

Ever since childhood, I have been fascinated by the night sky and its infinite beauty. The stars, the planets, the galaxies, and the constellations have always been a source of wonder and curiosity for me. As I grew older, my fascination with the universe deepened, and I became more interested in exploring the mysteries of astronomy. That curiosity led me to learn more about amateur astronomy and the people who dedicate their lives to it. That is when I came across the story of John Dobson, the "sidewalk astronomer," and his remarkable contribution to the world of astronomy. My journey with John Dobson began when I stumbled upon a documentary about his life on YouTube. The documentary showed how John Dobson, an ordinary man with no formal education in astronomy, became one of the most influential amateur astronomers of all time. The documentary showed how Dobson developed a simple, inexpensive, and effective telescope design that allowed anyone to observe the universe's wonders. His passion for astronomy and his desire to democratize it inspired me to learn more about him and his work. What struck me most about John Dobson was his dedication to sharing his knowledge with others. He spent countless hours on the streets of San Francisco, setting up his telescope and inviting passersby to look through it. He believed that everyone should have access to the beauty of the night sky, regardless of their background or financial means. Dobson's approach to astronomy was refreshingly simple. He believed that complex equipment was unnecessary to appreciate the cosmos and that anyone could become an astronomer with just a few essential tools. His philosophy resonated with me, as I, too, had always believed that astronomy was a field anyone could explore, regardless of their education or background. As I continued to learn more about John Dobson, I realized that his impact on the world was far-reaching. Countless amateur astronomers worldwide use his telescope design, and his legacy inspires new generations of stargazers. Dobson's contributions to astronomy went beyond the development of his telescope design. He was a prolific writer, having published several books on astronomy and a passionate advocate for the democratization of astronomy. He believed astronomy was not just a hobby or a science but a way of life that could transform the world. Numerous amateur astronomers, inspired by Dobson's work, bear witness to his impact on astronomy. Many of them have built their own Dobsonian telescopes and used them to explore the universe's wonders. Dobson's legacy has also inspired new generations of stargazers, who are now using technology to explore the universe in previously unimaginable ways. My journey with John Dobson has been nothing short of inspiring. His passion for astronomy and dedication to making it accessible to everyone has shown me that anyone can make a difference in the world, regardless of background or experience. Through his work, I have learned that the universe is a source of endless wonder and discovery and that the best way to appreciate it is to share it with others. In conclusion, John Dobson's legacy inspires me to explore the mysteries of the universe and share my love of astronomy with others. His story reminds us that we all have the power to make a difference and inspire others to look up and marvel at the stars. Dobson's approach to astronomy, his dedication to sharing his knowledge with others, and his belief in astronomy's democratization are lessons we can all learn from. As we continue to explore the universe, let us remember John Dobson's legacy and the impact he had on the world of astronomy.

YouTube Documentary Used for Final Draft: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bVbX19kabNc