Document Makeover - Bad News Message

Email to Kathryn Draft Message To: Kathryn Jones &..s@zaleskifilters.com> From: Evan Rogers &..s@labpro.com>

Subject: Zalenski Sales Relationship

Dear Kathryn,

I want to personally take the time to thank you for your work as LabPro's sales representative from Zaleski Filters for the past five years. Unfortunately, as the new procurement director, I have decided to end our relationship with Zaleski. In the past six months, the customer service you provided has been unacceptable.

When I began at LabPro, I contacted you to introduce myself and ask questions about a problem with the new online ordering system and when I discovered you were out of the office, I left you a voicemail asking you to contact me as soon as possible. Instead of a response, I was copied on an email to our technical support team where you informed them that the code required to use the new system was incorrect. At that point, you did not provide the required code. This lack of communication continued through a number of attempted phone calls and emails.

The final error was when you emailed two days later to inform me you fixed the code but were drowning with other clients and appreciated my patience. Then you asked if I could meet with you and the Zaleski regional sales manager the next daytoodiscuss renewing LabPro'sthree-yearcontract. With such short notice, I declined our meeting.

I realize this decision impacts Zaleski's sales, but we are responsible to our clients and our sales team to provide reliable services, products, and quick delivery. When it is time to reevaluate the contract with our new supplier, we would be happy to consider Zaleski's bid if your customer service issues have been resolved,.

Sincerely,

Evan Rogers

Director of Procurement

LabPro Services

As we edit this document, we are going to go from the top to the bottom looking for mistakes as we go. I'll give you suggestyoins on where to look. Let's start at the top with the subject line. WHat do you think?

- I think it works fine.

- I think it should be improved.