Summarize:

Co$-$Workers Getting On Your Nerves? Here$$s How to Handle It Better

Are your co$-$workers' quirks driving you crazy? From the cubicle$-$mate who talks too loudly on the phone, to the person who always microwaves fish for lunch, to the supervisor who$$s never on time for a meeting, every office has people who get on your nerves. But you don$$t have to let that get in the way of doing your job. Allison Gabriel studies relationships at work and what makes us stressed, and explains why those quirky co$-$workers sometimes get on our nerves. And conflict resolution consultant Jeremy Pollack gives us the tips and tricks to have conversations with your colleagues so you can work better together.

Send us your stories about work and careers! Email aswework@wsj$.$com, or leave us a voicemail at $212-416-2394.$

Further Reading:

You$$re Back at the Office. Your Annoying Colleagues Are, Too

Weird, Loud and Toxic: Deal With Your Co$-$Workers$$ Annoying Quirks

Workplace Report

Careers Newsletter

FULL TRANSCRIPT

This transcript was prepared by a transcription service. This version may not be in its final form and may be updated.

Charlotte Gartenberg: Do you have any pet peeves at work? Things your colleagues do that just get under your skin?

Speaker $2$: General corporate speak can be really exhausting. There's a tiny inkling of my soul that leaves my body and hovers above and just looks and goes, "How are we here?"

Speaker $3$: Lot of reply$-$alls that we get to emails that could have been just to one person, maybe didn't need this today.

Speaker $4$: Heating up seafood in the microwave, because the entire office ends up smelling like marshes. It's low tide, very, very gross.

Speaker $5$: When people don't take care of the office, push the chairs back in$,$ just be a good global citizen of the office. Yes, I think they're slobs.

Charlotte Gartenberg: I$\text{'}$m Charlotte Gartenberg, and this is As We Work from the Wall Street Journal. We are back in the office. Well, actually some of us never left, but in general, we are trending towards more in$-$person work. Facebook and Instagram parent Meta told employees that it's pausing applications for remote only positions for the first half of this year. Salesforce executives said that they want to increase the number of days that sales reps have to be in the office. In fact, according to data the Labor Department collected near the end of last year, the percentage of companies reporting little to no teleworking is approaching what it was before the pandemic. So we are at work, in$-$person, and you know who else is at work? Other people. That can be great for collaboration, but let's be honest, sometimes it can be really, really annoying. Maybe your coworker types very loud and the clack, clack, clack, clack, clack of those keys just drills into your head, or they stand too close when they talk to you.

Speaker $6$: Good morning, Charlotte, did you have a nice weekend?

Charlotte Gartenberg: Like, back up$.$ Maybe your deskmate thinks that the office is the perfect place to clip their nails. Or there's that one person that eats boiled eggs and sardines for lunch.

Speaker $7$: Yum.

Charlotte Gartenberg: Every day. The list goes on$.$ I spoke to workers in New York, the ones that you heard at the top of the show, and they didn't lack examples. The thing is$,$ those coworker quirks, the little habits that get under your skin, a lot of times people don't even know that they might be annoying other people. What utterly exasperates one person sometimes barely registers for another. But there are some things we can all agree on$.$

Allison Gabriel: Things that are broadly disruptive to your experience in the work environment, and things that I think signal maybe a lack of respect for other people, both their space and their time and, I guess, their other senses$,$ their smell and things that they're seeing in the workplace.

Charlotte Gartenberg: That's Allison Gabriel. She's a Professor of Management and Organizations at the University of Arizona's Eller College of Management, and she studies relationships, emotions, and stressors at work. She says white$-$knuckling it through our coworker's foibles can actually have a big impact on how we feel both at and about our jobs.

Allison Gabriel: It all comes down to just how our brain processes the distraction, because we tend to ruminate on it$.$ So even if you know, and like I said, I$\text{'}$m guilty of this, I$\text{'}$m super loud, all my family growing up is from New York and Jersey were loud, I$\text{'}$m aware, people have literally told me they've shut their doors when I$\text{'}$m in the hallways, I get it$.$ And even though you're trying to focus and you just know, "Okay, Allie's just a loud talker, she doesn't mean it$,"$ you're still going to be like, man, this is really loud and I wish it wasn't happening because it's really disrupting my workflow. So your brain starts ruminating and spiraling, you're not directly involved in them, but you