A man is coming to your agency for assistance after release from a drug rehabilitation center. He wants you to do more for him than you think is wise. You have been very helpful in ways you could, but you have also insisted he do some things for himself because you do not want him to become dependent. He is frustrated, and one day when you suggest to him that he try to call his lawyer himself, he blows up and yells, “This crazy place, sucking up the taxpayers’ money and for what? I get so sick and tired of your trying to make me do everything when that’s what you’re paid for. A bunch of idiots is what you are! Incompetents! Sure, I can do it myself! If I wanted to do it myself, I wouldn’t have come to you, would I?” What is your initial response?

In the examples that above, formulate an initial response to the anger and criticism you hear. On a separate piece of paper construct your answer, looking at the steps for disarming anger, and use those steps that seem appropriate. The four steps are: 

(1) thank the person for the comments, 

(2) ask for more information, 

(3) find some point on which you can agree, and (4) begin to look for a negotiated solution.