1. Understanding Your Conflict Script What conflict script did you learn in your family?

Think back to your childhood and adolescence, and try to remember rules for conflict that your family modeled implicitly and principles of conflict that your family explicitly endorsed.

•• Did people disagree openly with each other?

•• What was said when disagreements surfaced? Did your parents suggest that it was rude to argue?

Did they encourage open discussion of differences?

Were there any “rules” for how to argue?

•• What happened if disagreements were dealt with directly? Was the conflict resolved? What was the climate in the family like after the conflict?

•• How do you currently reflect your family’s conflict script? Now that you can edit family scripts and author your own, how would you like to deal with conflict?